Happiness is ….

Happiness really is just a thought away but at times it sure doesn’t seem that way. It is so easy to get caught up in the illusion we call reality and forget our true nature. Happiness is your birthright and as you clear out your filter system (which is composed of your beliefs, agreements, assumptions, and thoughts) you can learn to be happy no matter what is happening in your life. Give yourself that gift – do whatever it takes to lovingly retrain your mind and begin living your life based on love and the guidance of your spirit rather than the dictates of your mind. (more…)

The Crone

An article from the spring issue of Creations Magazine

As I explored my own femininity, I found that I had no problem with the spiritual stages of the maiden or the mother but I avoided thinking about old age and the crone stage. I remember the first time I heard the word crone. I immediately had a vision of a very old woman with a hooked nose and a hairy wart on her chin. There was absolutely no room in that vision for the dignity, wisdom and grace actually embodied in that stage of our evolution.

When I was a young girl my Father sat me down one day and told me my Mother would be a little crazy for the next few years, so be nice to her. Those were the only words ever spoken in my family about menopause. As I approached menopause I could feel my body going through changes and I knew I was entering another phase of my life. After some inner exploration I realized I equated menopause with a time of emotional instability and physical discomfort. (more…)

The Words behind the Words

When my mother was a young girl, she wanted to be a poet. Her teacher made fun of her poetry and my mom believed her. Based on her teacher’s opinion my mother gave up her dream. Each time I got my report card, my mother would be furious that I had once again flunked English. One day she gave me a thesaurus and I began to explore the meanings of words. Sometime later I was writing a story about a village and found the word ‘quaint.’ I can still remember the big red circle the teacher put around that word with her comment – great word!

I don’t think I ever told my mother I loved words and she died before I began writing. Today I am a wordsmith – I love words and have found great freedom through my writing. I achieved that freedom by giving myself permission to change my definitions of words like responsibility and fault, love and intimacy (I now think of it as into me see), and by breaking all the unspoken agreements I had with my parents, my friends, and society as a whole. (more…)

Betrayal ~ a Guide to Intimacy?

How many times in your life have you felt betrayed or let down by other people, yourself, or society as a whole? When we feel betrayed the emotions we feel are so primal, they seem to go to the very core of our being. Once we learn to view betrayal differently that feeling can become a gateway toward greater intimacy and a deeper connection to ourselves.

We all know what betrayal feels like but what is it really? The word comes from an old French verb that means to hand over or deliver up. The dictionary defines it as treachery, the disappointment of ones hopes and expectations, or to reveal, disclose, show, or exhibit.

I have found that betrayal can serve two very useful functions in my life that have very little to do with blaming the other person. They both have to do with me; my feelings of betrayal reveal my ability to communicate clearly and my willingness to take responsibility without blaming or judging myself or the other person. (more…)

Forgiveness and Beyond

As is the case for so many of us, I carried wounds from my childhood into my adult life. As a young girl some boys molested me. At the time I was devastated. I was sure it was my fault, and when the boys told me not to tell anyone or they would kill me I believed them. Before that I never felt like I fit in afterwards I felt like a total misfit. I was sure life was a complex game and everybody except me knew how to play. When I began my journey of self-discovery in my twenties I ran across the concept of forgiveness and with a great deal of anger and judgment promptly rejected the idea. Over the years my thoughts on forgiveness have changed drastically. Now I believe forgiveness is one of the most important steps we can take toward achieving self-acceptance, peace of mind, and happiness.

We are taught to think in terms of duality: right and wrong, positive and negative, good and bad, black and white, you and me. Our society is based on the concept of domination – the society and the individual are seen as separate – the problem and the solution are two different things. As long as we view the world that way judgment and comparison are very much a part of our thought process. (more…)

Tis the Season

December 2003

The holiday season is upon us. A friend of mine told me last week a woman was trampled trying to get to the DVD sales table at Walmart. Over the years I’ve had many opinions about the holiday season. I’ve gone from looking forward to it all year as a child, ignoring it and hating it as a young adult, to looking at it as a time to reflect, share love, and see how far I’ve come in creating peace.

Whenever I think of the holidays I always think of the phrase, “Peace on earth, goodwill to all, and to all a good night.” I like to think of the holidays as holy days. This is the time of year that the sun changes courses in the heavens. What if we set our intent to change the course of our thinking as well?

I have had many discussions with people lately about peace and war. Of one thing I am sure, peace on earth is impossible if peace doesn’t live within each of us. Peace of mind and judgment can’t really coexist. (more…)